Punk 57. Wow. What a ride. I loved this book to pieces honestly. Just—beautiful.

The emotional scenes are what really got to me; taking two incredibly rough, cocky characters and watching them break down, be vulnerable, and being able to come right back around again was everything to me.

The spice felt a bit abrupt at some parts, but was generally very good,

and got even better towards the end when it was rightfully placed around more vulnerable scenes.

4⭐️??

did i almost dnf this like 3 times? yes.
did i also finish it in under 2 days because i couldn't put it down? also yes.

clearly, i have a lot of conflicting feelings about this book.

i was not expecting the high school setting. tbh i spent part of this pretending the characters were in university and not high school. if tv has taught me anything it's that american high school and university are basically the same except that one of them costs a lot of money and has fraternities/sororities 😂

if you're the type of person who only reads books with MCs you can relate to, then this probably isn't for you unless you're an awful teenager with issues. there's a lot of problematic behaviour in this book, but it's a pretty accurate reflection of some peoples lived experiences. (and just because it wasn't your lived experience, doesn't mean it's not true)

you'll spend a lot of time not liking the characters, bc they are very unlikable for a lot of the book and that's kind of the point. these aren't characters who are thriving during the peak years of their lives in a perfect fictional world. they are characters who struggling to find themselves, learning who they are/who they can be, and learning who they don't want to be.

i also really appreciate the way misha's sisters death was handled. we often see grief from the pov of the parent who loses a child, but the experience of the sibling is usually forgotten. the effect that the death of a younger adult has on the siblings and how that effects all the relationships in the family is so complex. i think that was handled really well and quite accurately here.

there's a lot more floating around in my brain, but i can't get the words right for now, so maybe i'll edit this later with some more thoughts. or maybe not. who knows.

I stayed up till 3am binging this book last night and finished it as soon as I got back home after running errands today. The spice was spicyyy, but the plot was fully there. I decided to read it in between Hideaway and Kill Switch and I absolutely adored the pop ups from my favorite characters in the Devil’s Night series.

I related to Ryen so much, it physically hurt. The pain of wanting to fit in with the popular kids at school is something that I think almost everyone has experienced and I truly appreciated the way Penelope Douglas portrayed her as a character.

Since going back on my ✨meds✨, I haven’t been able to cry, but I’ll tell you what.. I was SO close to breaking down when that last plot twist hit us. The raw emotion from Misha and the devastating conversation had me yearning to be able to shed tears and if I wasn’t mentally stable thanks to a little (Dr. prescribed*) pill, I would have been bawling my eyes out.

Ready to resume my Devil’s Night reads— Penelope Douglas has quickly become one of my new favorite authors. 🖤

i read this book once a couple years ago and i loved it then, it was my first real smut book. reading again, it is still so good. the pacing is awesome and you don’t have to wait forever for the tension to build - it’s already there due to the plot! normally plot isn’t really something that authors pay too much attention to in smut novels but there are some twists in this book that make it really enjoyable beyond the hot sex.

Ryen was a terrible person and I could not for the life of me like her. Same with Misha. Just not for me… 

**check triggers before starting** 

This high school romance tackles intense and important topics like b*llying, h0m0ph0bia, body shaming, and other challenges that teens often face. It was emotional and heavy at times, as the story showed teenagers navigating through serious struggles. The mention of death hit particularly hard, and it was heartbreaking to see a 17-year-old dealing with such grief.

What stood out to me was the unique friendship between Misha and Ryen, built through seven years of letter-writing without ever meeting or knowing how they look. But after they meet? The chemistry is just 🔥🥵. The book reminded me of the Sex Education, as it explored real, raw issues, and even though some parts were sad, I couldn’t stop reading. The suspense kept me fully engaged from start to finish.

The only thing I wish had been explored was Misha and his dad’s relationship rebuild—I really wanted to see how they turned out. I loved how everything resolved in the end, and even though it was an emotional read, I liked it enough. If you’re into high school romance with a mix of spice and serious themes, this book is definitely worth checking out.